MANHATTAN, IL — It was a chance encounter between two tourists at a Cancun bar on a December 2008 night. One was just ending his stay; the other’s vacation was just beginning. It was less than 24 hours of interaction, but that was enough.
“We only knew each other for one night,” Duncan Freer told Patch.
That night would set in motion a goosebumps-inducing, nearly cinematic love story. Freer, who lived in England at the time, had walked into a bar and crossed paths with Alexis, an American and native of tiny town Manhattan, Illinois, who would become the love of his life.
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“… As soon as she walked in, she lit up the room,” Freer said. “I fell in love with her immediately. I was a bit of a cynic, not really believing in love at first sight, but when you know, you know.”
That was 16 years ago. Two children, a continental move to Frankfort, and just shy of 13 years of marriage between them, Freer now faces a new reality—life without her. Alexis, 40, died June 14, four years after a diagnosis of incredibly rare ocular melanoma.
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As he prepares to deliver her eulogy, he finds himself a bit stuck.
“It’s difficult to write something, without talking in clichés,” Freer told Patch. “She really was friends with everybody, doesn’t matter who you were.”
Alexis was born in Joliet and raised in Manhattan, Freer said. She graduated from Lincoln-Way Central High School, followed by Kankakee Community College. She went on to work as a Radiological Technologist.
After their meeting in 2008, their romance quickly wrote itself. Alexis would visit him for a week a time in England, before eventually moving there in September 2009. They married in Lemont in 2011, and their daughter Lilah was born in England in 2012. When they conceived again, they relocated back to Frankfort to be closer to her family, Freer said, and along came son Callum in 2015.
In 2020, the couple was dealt a significant blow, when Freer was diagnosed with Ocular Melanoma, a cancer that develops in the cells that produce pigment. Pigment gives color to your skin, hair and eyes. Although it is the most common eye cancer in adults, ocular melanoma is very rare overall, according to the American Academy of Ophthalmology. It’s found in only 5 per million people each year. The cancer starts in the eye, and often metastasizes to other parts of the body, most commonly the liver. Despite treatment supplemented with naturopathic remedies, Alexis’ cancer spread to her liver; a dozen tumors were found in January 2023.
After nearly five years of treatment, Alexis entered hospice in early-June. She died nearly two weeks later, just one month after her 40th birthday. Family remembered her resilience and courage throughout her illness.
“From the date of her diagnosis, she did not take one backward step,” her obituary reads. “She tried everything to stop the disease in its tracks and managed to exceed all expectations by recently celebrating her 40th birthday with family and friends.”
The community rallied behind the family throughout her battle. A GoFundMe started to support her family has raised nearly $47,000 to date. “Lexi,” as she was affectionately known, also organized a benefit that amassed over 600 people where she raised funds that went directly to charities that are on the forefront of research and development for new treatments for ocular melanoma.
Her indefatigable positivity buoyed her and her family’s spirits.
“She fought with everything she had with resilience, grace, and determination,” the GoFundMe organizer wrote in sharing the news of her death. “She gave back in every way possible to help others that are going down the same path. That gift will continue to help many others even though she is gone.”
Alexis was the only daughter born to Jon and Vicky Cheney, with three brothers, Aaron, Adam, and Austin.
“Alexis was the most beautiful, inspirational, and fun-loving person that anyone could have the pleasure of meeting,” her obituary reads. “Everyone was captivated by her grace, kindness, sense of humor, and infectious laugh.”
A visitation for Alexis will be held Friday, June 28 at St Paul’s United Church Of Christ, 140 Thelma St., Manhattan. Freer anticipates a large crowd at the visitation, and with a capacity of only 300 at the church, he hopes to live-stream the service. A reception is planned afterward, to be held at Fritz’s, 225 S State St., also in Manhattan. Owned by family friend Nick Been, the bar holds special significance to Alexis and her family.
“That was her bar,” Freer said with affection.
Freer made note of the support shown by family and friends throughout Alexis’ illness and since her passing.
“I am bowled over by the love and support we have been provided,” Freer said. “Family … Friends of friends—they’ve just been amazing.”
In retrospect, one night in a bar was everything—the significance of being in that place, at that time, isn’t lost on Freer. He likened it to a romantic comedy where the main character’s life could be altered depending on if she catches a train.
“… That was the ‘Sliding Doors’ moment, wasn’t it,” Freer said, reflecting.
“… She was such an amazing human being.”
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